Physical != Mental

How do you deal with not having physical chemistry with the perfect guy but not being able to stop thinking about the absolutely wrong guy?

Physical attraction is way harder to trick your brain into. Mental attraction, however, is often easy to find in the short term. Our brains seem to trick ourselves into falling for all the good parts of people we are physically attracted to and ignore the red flags they possess. On the other hand, no matter how much you like a person, it’s so hard to force a physical connection where there is none.

Why is it so much harder to be with someone when we like their personality, but aren’t physically into them?

Scientifically, it’s easy to explain that a person’s hormones make them want someone who they find physically attractive and that unless someone is in love, their brain doesn’t do the same for those who just have a great personality. But what do we do with this science? How do we fix this in reality?

I don’t fully have the answer. This is a life lesson I’m still learning and kind of struggling with. Maybe we really just have to wait for love to have both physical and mental attraction, but sometimes our brain confuses us into wanting whoever will be physically appealing and can trick the rest of us into overlooking their personality. Maybe every time we feel this happening, we just have to snap ourselves out of it and hopefully the following can help:

1. Read this article again.

2. Have a friend/family member meet the person in question (if having them meet someone close to you will be weird, then that’s your answer right there. Snap out of it!).

3. Find a hobby you used to love again and see if you can forget about them if you don’t physically have them in your life for a few days. If your mind can stop thinking about them after a legitimate break (and don’t lie to yourself about the break either), then you have your answer.

4. Write a journal entry and try to find what you like about them. Is it abs? Or is it their view about life?

Hope this helps and please comment what helps you below. How do YOU deal with not having physical chemistry with the perfect guy but not being able to stop thinking about the absolute wrong guy?

#physicalattraction #selfhelp #personalgrowth #ovethinking #relationship #selflove #love #lifelesson